My oldest has been in the terrible two stage for over a year now. He has really good streaks where everything is perfect and then really horrible streaks where he turns in to a living breathing demon. Don’t get me wrong I absolutely adore my baby. He made me a mother and I wouldn’t ever trade him for anything.. But this week has felt like a terrorist attack.
I know this phase is completely normal and doesn’t last forever (though I’ve been told it does last for a few years). Even knowing that, I still find myself feeling defeated. I had this perfect picture in my head while pregnant and in the “new mom phase” that my life would be perfect. That my child would never act like the other kids throwing tantrums. I dreamed of a halo on his head and no tears (I know right now you’re all laughing just like me).
The situation turned from ponies and rainbows when my son was about 18 months old and has now quickly been escalating. He’s that child that when you say “don’t touch” automatically sticks his finger as close as possible to the thing that he’s not supposed touch, all the while making eye contact with me and grinning. He screams super high pitched and has now even learned that throwing himself on the ground while screaming is great fun.
Everyone tells you that terrible two’s are awful but of course no one believes. Even if you’re like me and took the advice, no amount of preparation (including hanging out with friends who have toddlers, and taking care of toddler sized family members) helped. Oh no! When it comes to your own tiny human, it’s a whole new level of hell created just for you! Ever heard of the ten fold rule? You know the one where your kids will be ten times worse than you were for the misery you put your mom through? Yeah well it sucks! There I said it. Terrible two’s absolutely suck!
I know one day I’ll look back and miss these days but right now, it seems like this is how it will be for life! I love my baby and of course I would go through hell and back for him. The days that he is all smiles and cuddles are the days I live for! Those kinds of days are seemingly few and really spread apart but they are so worth it! My boy is my tiny bestfriend and so like me that it’s scary but he makes all the rough days, tears, and all of the questioning myself worth it!
I know other moms out there are in this rut too, and we can get through it! One thing I’ve learned is that distraction and over expressing love are key right now. My little one seems to act a little better if I give him a huge long hug and tell him how much I love him and that I’m thankful he is my baby. If that doesn’t work, I redirect him with toys and things. Yes I know, when they are throwing a fit sometimes that’s easier said than done. If you have a moment of frustration and nothing works, it’s ok to walk away for a second and breath. Your toddler will be fine I promise. When they grow up they will remember just how much you loved them and the wonderful world they grew up in, not the Tuesday where you cried in the bathroom because the sippy cup was the wrong color and they threw themselves on the floor.
There is no black and white for raising a child. There’s no perfect way at all! As long as you raise your child with love and respect, the rest will follow! You got this mama! There is a light at the end of the tunnel! These days are few in the span of a lifetime. Just remember, you are never alone!
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